Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Proof Positive

I have a message for every celebrity politico out there stumping for ANY candidate. Kids, I couldn't care less what you think of a particular candidate. Your star power doesn't give you rhyme nor reason to expect your views about a particular candidate to sway me in the slightest. I would literally have to move BACKWARD down the evolutionary chain for that to happen. You see, when I weigh for whom I am going to vote, I use this funny thing that sits between my ears. Yes, you know it...MY BRAIN. And then I ask, "are the policies of this candidate in fully conformity as they are expressed and knowable with the Catholic Faith I profess?" Then and only then do I pick a candidate.

To my fellow Americans, if you let these blown-dry, air-brushed, liposucked, more-plastic-in-their-bodies-than-a-Tupperware-party, pot toking nattering ninnies tell you who to vote for, then we will truly have the president we deserve or at least, that you are asking for.

Thank you...screed over. I feel better. Don't you?

No comments: