Ridding Myself of Roommates
If you are surprised to find out that I had roommates here in the rectory at Alva, trust me when I say, that no one was as surprised as I. But you can put down the notepad and desist your letter to the Archbishop because it's completely harmless and completely taken care of.
My housekeeper one evening as she was finishing up the housework told me that she had found mouse droppings scattered around the kitchen. "Great," I thought, "filthy vermin in the house...." As it turned out there were two mice in the house, one upstairs and one downstairs. Apparently, my rectory is some sort of rodent sublet. Through a little patience and in one case, using C.S.I. techniques to identify a peach pit that had moved and looking for tell-tale signs of rodent chewing so that I could bait the trap, both rodents are dead and gone. And no, I didn't anoint them or give them funeral rites. They went straight into the trash.
To answer the burning question on everyone's mind, I did dispatch the little critters using glue traps, which, by the way, are not any more humane than a spring trap. In fact, I would go so far as to say, the spring traps are more humane. Granted that they weren't eating much, here are two words which justify my actions: hanta virus.
Need two more? How about "bubonic plague"?
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